Feb
21

Proofreading is a Dying Art – too funny not to share

By on February 21st, 2011

Image from 123RF

Today I received this from one of our Spirit Authors members. It had me in stitches, and I simply had to share it with you. Apparently, it’s all over the web, so I haven’t managed to find who the original author is (the comments below are theirs, not mine), but whoever you are, thank you for the fun today.

AND… if any of you reading this happen to be professional proofreaders, you are most welcome to put your business info in the comments below. I am sure my readers, members and clients will appreciate your help when they get ready to publish their books… I know I will!

Thank you Spirit Authors member Joan Gillman for sharing this.

These are from actual headlines that appeared in the press…

—————————————————————————-

Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter
This one appeared in the SGV Tribune. After a reader called in, it took the editor two or three readings before the he realized that what he was reading was impossible. They put in a correction the next day.

—————————————————————————-

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
No crap, really? Ya think?
—————————————————————————-

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that’s taking things a bit far!
———————————————————–

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!
—————————————————————

Miners Refuse to Work after Death
No-good-for-nothing’ lazy so-and-so’s!
——————————————————

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial!
———————————————————-

War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!
—————————————————————-

If Strike Isn’t Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Ya think?!
———————————————————————–

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought!
—————————————————————-

Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
They may be on to something!

————————————————————————

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there’s something stronger than duct tape?
———————————————————-

Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge!
———————————————-

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Weren’t they fat enough?!
———————————————–

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That’s what he gets for eating those beans!
————————————————-

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken?
****************************************

Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Chainsaw Massacre all over again!
That’ll teach’m to be dropouts!

**************************************************

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!
*******************************************
And the winner is….

Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Did I read that right?
**************************************************


I just couldn’t help but send this along. Too funny.
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
No crap, really? Ya think?
—————————————————————————-

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Now that’s taking things a bit far!

———————————————————–
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
What a guy!
—————————————————————

Miners Refuse to Work after Death
No-good-for-nothing’ lazy so-and-so’s!
——————————————————

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
See if that works any better than a fair trial!
———————————————————-

War Dims Hope for Peace
I can see where it might have that effect!
—————————————————————-

If Strike Isn’t Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Ya think?!
———————————————————————–

Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Who would have thought!
—————————————————————-

Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain;PoliceSuspect Homicide
They may be on to something!
————————————————————————

Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
You mean there’s something stronger than duct tape?
———————————————————-

Man Struck By Lightning:Faces Battery Charge
He probably IS the battery charge!
———————————————-

New Study of Obesity Looks for LargerTest Group
Weren’t they fat enough?!
———————————————–

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
That’s what he gets for eating those beans!
—————- ———————————

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Do they taste like chicken?
****************************************

Local High SchoolDropoutsCut in Half
Chainsaw Massacre all over again!

That’ll teach’m to be dropouts!
************************************************** *

Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
Boy, are they tall!
*******************************************

And the winner is….
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead

Did I read that right?
************************************************** *


About Lynn Serafinn, Creator of Spirit Authors

Lynn Serafinn

Lynn Serafinn is a transformation coach, book promotion coach, radio host and bestselling author of the book The Garden of the Soul: lessons from four flowers that unearth the Self.

Her upcoming book, The 7 Graces of Marketing, is coming in June 2011.

She also works as a campaign manager for mind-body-spirit authors and has produced several top-10 book campaigns, including FOUR #1-sellers, in 2010 alone. She created Spirit Authors to offer training, coaching, business-building and inspiration for mind-body-spirit authors, whether established or aspiring. Contact Lynn about YOUR book project at at http://spiritauthors.com/contact.

Be sure to subscribe to this blog for regular book writing and promotion tips (just fill in form at right of your screen).

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Throughout the year, Lynn also hosts large-scale telesummits with world-class speakers on a range of mind-body-spirit topics. Your subscription to Creative Spirit will ensure you’ll be the first to know how to attend these free events.


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Comments

comments

Categories : News, Writing & Editing

Comments

  1. Patrick Ross says:

    Great stuff! In defense of the copyeditors who usually write headlines, they are being asked to do the work of five people in today’s media world, but hopefully they themselves can laugh at these.

    I am reminded of a PDQ Bach song (a fake parody composer) that emphasizes the importance of a missing comma. The holiday carol urges an uncle to stoke the fire but instead encourages others to assault him: “Throw the yule log on Uncle John.”

  2. A great reminder, Patrick. Indeed, copyeditors must feel like unsung heroes of the journalism world. Regarding PDQ Back (aka Peter Schikele), he was one of my faves when I was a classical musician and I had the great pleasure of playing a concert with him (I was a violinist in the orchestra) when he came to Texas back in the 1970s. It was very difficult to keep from laughing and concentrate on my playing!

  3. Thanks for posting, this gave me a good laugh!

    Would love to assist heart & spirit-centered authors with their proofreading and editing. :)

    Warmly,
    Carolyn Beale
    832-478-1469

  4. These are hilarious! Now I don’t feel so bad when my headlines are accused of being too wordy or verbose. Hey, at least the point is clear. :-) I always say I need to work on fine-tuning my headline and caption skills. It’s a lot harder than you think.

    Btw, Lynn, since you mentioned it’s okay to advertise, I’d be happy to offer my services as a proofreader/copy editor for anyone looking for a word nerd to review their writing projects. I’m a full-time freelance writer and editor with extensive experience in book, magazine and digital publishing.

    Feel free to check out my site or shoot any questions my way: candace AT incandescere.com

  5. Thanks for laugh. Lynn, you are obviously a multi-talented lady.

  6. James Phillips says:

    “Let’s eat, Grandma,” has a considerably different meaning from, “Let’s eat Grandma”.

  7. James Phillips says:

    OTOH: Best headline I ever read was for a story about a convention for telephone tech at which almost no one showed up:

    Wrong number

  8. Jill Slack says:

    These made me laugh and worry about the journalism industry at the same time.

  9. Jason says:

    They’re funny- but internet skepticism takes over… Some should really know better before forwarding….

    http://www.snopes.com/humor/nonsense/head97.asp

  10. Thank you so much for this much-needed laugh! I am a freelance book editor (as well as a writer myself), and while I work with a plethora of brilliant writers and adore them, we are all human, and occasionally, our fingers work faster than our logical thinking! I enjoyed this and believe my clientele will get a kick out of it, so I’ll pass it along. And for the record, if anyone needs a book editor, feel free to contact me at autiej@gmail.com

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